| Thursday, November 25th, 2004 |
| 11:38 pm |
I'm back!
...but not here. Here: http://www.supremeprince.blogspot.com |
| Monday, November 1st, 2004 |
| 8:22 pm |
|
| Wednesday, December 31st, 2003 |
| 3:09 am |
New Years Eve party -Empire |
| Monday, December 8th, 2003 |
| 8:01 am |
Looking back at the last couple of months entries, I've realized how ridiculous and pointless this journal has become. It looks like some teenage girl's snot-rag. I dont understand what brought me to think that people wanted to read all this pity-party bullshit. I'm gone like Donkey Kong at least until I can find something worthwhile to write about. "We'll meet again. Don't know where. Don't know when..." "I cen't stop loving you. I've made up my mind." "So long to this cold, cold part of the world." "We're the Unicorns! We're more than horses!" "I dont want to waste your time. I just want to know you're allright." |
| 7:50 am |
I fell asleep writing this.
Somewhere along the way the light went out. I was too busy walking aimlessly too notice the dank cave i wandered into. It soon became too dark to matter. So I continued to walk no destination, no goal. Nothing was left except the ghosts of the past and the lack of a future. "everyone I know goes away in the end...." from Nine Inch Nail's "Hurt" (preferrably sang by Johnny Cash (R.I.P.)) |
| Wednesday, December 3rd, 2003 |
| 6:41 am |
And what's with the ghosts all of a sudden? |
| 6:37 am |
At what point do you stop waking up and being surprised that the only monster in the room is you? |
| Monday, December 1st, 2003 |
| 11:20 pm |
December
It's hard to believe it's december already. The holiday season's a hard one for us lonely types. Well I guess I should'nt speak for others. I know it's hard for me. It always feels like there's somebody out there I should be keeping warm. The hope is fading with the years. I just wish the want would fade as well. I drove past a something out of a movie today. It was one of those surreal moments where you're just waiting to see the cameramen just behind a shrub. There was an awful lot of police presence outside my old high school. Then I noticed the people with signs. Some fools were there protesting Gayday. Then a closer look. My former principal speaking with my former jail sgt. I cant explain why this struck such a chord but I hit the gas and sped away. My mind reeled with feelings of responsibility. Could the group I once led ...shit that was 5 years ago... I cant explain this ...so I went to work had my ass-rubbed while I tied my shoe (dont ask, I cant make much sense of it either) realized I was early and went to barnes & noble for an hour. While at B&N I flipped through Jamie Oliver's newest cookbook. In cooking news. I've been teaching myself how to recently. I love it. But I cant afford to do it too often because I only like cooking with the best ingredients. I also have my first informal catering job. One of the girls I work with is having a girl's sleepover and they want me to cook for them. It will be fun because her boyfriend also a coworker and one of my friends lives a couple of doors down, where I'll be cooking and probably drinking. I just finished watching Raising Victor Vargas while writing this. It was very good and quite recommendable if not only for the two great-looking kids in it. I'm not sure why not either of the stars have'nt been on somebody's hot-shit list. I'm awfully tired and felt like I could have slept all day today. It was a night of gluttony last night, humongous Tiger shrimp cocktail, delicious jambalaya, oysters...I shucked oysters for the first time in my life last night and found that I enjoy shucking oysters more than I do eating them. On the other hand a couple of sundays ago I had sushi that I really enjoyed for the fist time. I'm really tired of this feeling of hopelesness as far as my love life goes. I wish I could be all stoic about it and just will it away. It's hopeless in two ways. One I havent had anyone really attracted to me since well...ever. Two, the girls I've really fallen for in retrospect I realize probably would'nt have made me happy other than relieving the immediate pain of loneliness. Right now.... |
| Thursday, November 13th, 2003 |
| 6:51 am |
|
| Tuesday, November 11th, 2003 |
| 5:09 pm |
Consumer Alert!!
Consumer Alert: the much touted 67 cent "Soft 'n Gentle" bathroom tissue is neither soft nor gentle despite it's easy on the eyes, pastel-blue color! We're talking sand-paper here folks. |
| Thursday, October 16th, 2003 |
| 6:21 pm |
Is it that part of the decade again?
Clear your calendars dear friends on the date of 11-01-03. The Empire shall be hosting a b-day party for 5 people. My self being one of them. This will be the first time in recent years I've actually celebrated my b-day. Quite frankly it's somewhat against my wishes but since there's already gonna be tons of people making a mess at my house that I dont know, I might as well invite my friends as well to come make a mess. Lords knows there'll be hell to pay, in the morning. I predict that the level of debauchery shall be of epic proportions as of yet unknown to The Empire. Maybe not on the Caligula level but I wont rule anything out so long as it does'nt happen in my bed. Most important of all please BYOB as my and my roommates finances shall be significantly reduced after buying presents for the other 4 people who's celebration it shall be. If this b-day boy (I'm the only boy) gets asked one time for a beer at his own b-day party a proper fit shall be thrown. I only warn as this has happened to my roommate at his b-day party and it made me quite angry. But I hope to see as many of you there as possible. The other 4 b-dayers are my roommate Kara her best friend Aimee, and our good friends Jenny and Cammie. |
| Monday, October 13th, 2003 |
| 9:34 am |
Vice
She must have had x-ray vision. She saw right through the veil. Two questions that cut deep to the bone. One answer was probably the hardest lie I've ever had to tell in my life. The other was so random, yet timely it left me feeling like I was being interviewed by some one who had studied for our conversation. Her comfort in our first meeting was alarming yet I followed her down the rabbit hole. She left me in a very peculiar mood. Now I'm tired from lack of sleep but I fight sleep till the early morning hours. Not that I'm being productive in these hard-earned hours of waking life. In fact early this morning I stared at a wall for 30 minutes. I wake-up tired and groggy. There's much to do and little time to do it in. But quite frankly I'm running out of motivation. I dont think my own being can provide the necessary reasons for me to live the life I think I should lead. There are however those who have been particularly productive the past few weeks. Here they are INPO: Big Boi, Dre 3000, MF Doom, Quentin Tarantino, Sofia Coppola (this is a guess), Brock Rizy, Team Alpha, Team Wilco, Mogwai and others... |
| Monday, September 22nd, 2003 |
| 1:50 am |
Update your Journal...
Violence out my window. Try not to contribute, but slowly losing that which stops me. Traffic jam in my nostrils. The critics are on my trail. The past is fading faster than I can remember it. It has nothing to do with the sativistic methods I sometime use to dull the pain I eat for breakfast every morning. I'll watch "My Science Project" this week and Dennis Hopper will be present saying "Maaann" the way he does. I plan to do this in the same day I have my longest run of the week and cut myself in the face. Will there be enough time? Probably not. There should be two of me. Or rather not. The first is never satisfied as it is. Maybe a helper. Hey there was that one "You're so cute...I'll come back to see you." But of course it probably was'nt meant in that way. It never is. Why should it be? "My mom says I'm cool!" Memory laspe more commonplace. Forgot, how forgettable I was. The more I grasp for permanence the more slips through my fingers. Guess consideration is'nt in very high supply or demand these days. Is there some baby shortage going on that nobody told me about? I've never been happy with 2nd place, but I'm just trying to place now. I watched Karate Kid last night, nursing the wounds that never heal. Had it not been for Karate Kid, I would never have gotten into martial arts. Had I not gotten into martial arts, I would never have wrestled. Karate Kid and I both had large tournaments to compete in, in High School. Karate Kid and I both had Arch-Nemeses. Our Arch-Nemeses both talked shit about us and were unable to back it up. Karate Kid and I both injured our left knees. Karate Kid and I both had people deliberately attack our injured knees. Karate Kid had Elizabeth Shue. I had Jesus. Karate Kid had Mr. Miyagi. My coach was more like the Sensei of the Cobra-Kai dojo. My coach told me at the end of the season he wanted a mean heavyweight next year. Karate Kid fought through the pain to win first place using crane-technique. I fought through to win second in region and make it to the quarterfinals of the state tournament using the Zen-Jesus technique. Karate Kid had parts two and three. I had a short and dissappointing run as a submission fighter. Karate Kid other than having a cousin named vinny now acts in direct-to-video movies. I wait tables and read stuff most people think is bullshit. |
| Friday, August 29th, 2003 |
| 12:26 pm |
for -$500.00
The real question is will I have enough gas to make it back home from school. Tired. Tired of reaching out. |
| 11:16 am |
This journal entry has been brought to you by Amazon.com: Conquering the World One CD at a Time.
 Cant wait to see the Reverend this saturday night. Not looking forward to hearing his heart-wrenching songs while sitting next to someone I've come to be very attracted to since as always the feelings are'nt reciprocated. But it's the Reverend and I havent been to church in a long time, so I'll weather the storm.  I really like the single "Can't Stop, Wont Stop" by the Young Gunz off the above compilation. It's nice to hear some great minimal production on mainstream hip-hop radio. The lyrical content is nothing new but the form is top notch. Also look for Freeway coming out of the Roc-A-Fella camp, as well. While Jay-Z has sucked since "Life and Times...vol 2" and Beanie Sigel has always been a joke, Roc-A-Fella is starting to put out some good stuff. Does this mean you'll soon be seeing me sporting Roca Wear? No, but I'll be paying a little more attention to their sounds.  I treated myself to Illmatic on the first day of school. Get it. It's even better than you remember.  09-23-03 Still tired from the sleepless night, two-nights before. Strange paternal feelings overwhelmed as I sat next to my bed watching the young boy breathe softly, asleep. His house had become a warzone that night as it often does. But this night was especially bad him and his sister came over to Empire to call the police. I did'nt want him going back. So he spent the night. His ankle was swollen and he had to limp around. We iced it for a little bit but he was tired and fell asleep quick. I sat vigil, a sobbing mess. I could only think about how this kind-hearted boy would soon turn into a hardened product of his environment. I've never felt so helpless in my life. I tried to think of some way to take him away from that mess of a family-life. But at the same time realizing I cant even take care of myself. I'm slowly beginning to understand anger born out of frustration. "Cause when it's my time to go, I wait for God wit the fo'-fo'" from Nas' Halftime |
| Wednesday, August 27th, 2003 |
| 8:53 am |
|
| Wednesday, August 20th, 2003 |
| 4:20 pm |
Neighborhood Alert! Two bikes stolen off porch last night.
Has anyone else had dreams where their teeth fall out? According to my roommies this is a common occurence in dreams and generally represents anxiety. Scary Moment: While watching The Shining for the first time ever someone walks up my entryway calling "Hello? Anybody here?" just as the chef returns to the Overlook hotel calling the exact same line. My mom thought it was quite funny when I recalled the story to her. School starts next week! Woohoo! Classes most looked forward to are as follows: Intro Phil & Early Judaic Thought. Arnie has done his homework. But he also insists on using the ridiculous one-liners he is so famous for. One day, last week looked like the Apocalypse: Power outage across NorthEastern America, Heatwave in France kills thousands, Earthquake in Greece, SARS death rate increases. Now the palestinian/isreali peace talks are all but dead. I should ready my steed and buy guns lots of them. The guns would be primarily for shooting rogue skeet. |
| Friday, August 15th, 2003 |
| 2:22 pm |
Sittin right next to me.
In a dream I actually won money in Vegas but lost it quickly on the roulette wheel which is not to be confused with Shark Roulette. I do crazy things with crazy people. In a dream stealth bombers fly by my house while I'm standing outside on the balcony. After the jetstream has it's way with me, I clutch my stomach noxious with the knowledge of the death and destruction that just passed. I'm brought to tears. Did you know that the Plasma center gives you 5 extra bucks if they mess up when they stick you? I'll have to be squirmy next time. I'm building up a nice collection of track marks. Heroin chic here I come. God stole my backpack. That sonuvabitch! He's punishing me for going to the city of sin and enjoying it. Contents that are MIA: journal of the past 2 years. Steppenwolff by Herman Hesse. The 42nd Parallel by John Dos Passos. An old world religions textbook. My friends script. Various toiletries including a tribladed razor, and my personal scent of the last 1.5 years. Somehow Dr. Hunter Thompson's Kingdom of Fear survived the divine theft. Everytime I think about it I want to punch something. Since God is in everything right? But I dont 'cause I'm not going to come down to his level! |
| Thursday, August 14th, 2003 |
| 4:03 pm |
|
| Sunday, August 10th, 2003 |
| 9:59 am |
Ridin Spinnas, Ridin Spinnas (they dont stop!)
If I had a lot of money I'd put spinnas on my CRV. And I'd pay my cell phone bill so I could get voicemail and a phone that works. It's an extravagance yes, but hey what are you gonna do I'm rich! Vegas was an amazing time. About 20 or so people were piled into two large passenger vans for the surprise wedding of Nick & Kara, my roommates. Great fun was had on the way there, while there and on the way back. My good friend Angie came up to see me from AZ. And there's something about that girl that just makes me go crazy. She is my party-pal. Whenever we hang we cant help but get tore-up on the sauce. And it's always a drama-free, good time. All I can say is everybody should go to Vegas at least once. When we arrived during the daytime, I was amazed by what a spectacle the city was. But at night I opted to take a lone stroll up the strip and just marvel at what the vices of man can create. It is an amazing city of indulgence that few could resist getting caught up in the spirit of. But now just a few dollars poorer and a few million brain-cells lesser I have some great memories (including Elton John's "Your Song" at the Bellagio fountain dance) that will last a lifetime. |
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92.1){kind=small}
adan's journal
